I Swear I’ll Never Lose my Glasses Again- Here’s my Secret

(Last Updated On: January 4, 2018)

 

Accept that your eyeglasses will eventually disappear   


 

E

ye glasses are objects that can, and will vanish in thin air. Like socks they mysteriously disappear without a trace. Many will come to your aid offering hope to no avail. All search is futile – they’re gone. A leprechaun is perhaps to blame, but no one sees them as your property gets snatched out of this earth.

These events come to shows us the mysteries of our universe. There are small cracks in the time space continuum as glasses, socks and pens fall into a parallel universe to never be seen again. We’ll get them back when we finally go through the same fabric of time; perhaps when we die.

There, a small leprechaun will hand us back our lost possessions with a smirk. At that moment we’ll realize the futility of everything and become instantly enlightened. Mean while back on heart we’ll suffer irritation as our eyeglasses have vanished during a Christmas party. I left mine at the table, and when I came back, it was gone.

I decided to fight these evil events which are usually followed by a $300 dollar price tag. I was able to successfully keep my pen from disappearing at work, and will the same weapon to defeat the trickster leprechaun once and for all.

Here’s what I’ve found

#1. Accept the fact they do disappear

First you need to understand and accept; eyeglasses will disappear. Without coming to grips with this reality, you’ll continue losing them over and over again. Give up the idea you’re under control. You’ll lose them eventually no matter what. But once you accept the hard fact, you’ll be inspired to be hyper vigilant. If you get this #1 concept down, you’re half way there. It will also be easier to grasp that once you shell out $300 for a new pair.

#2. Never leave them at the table, use cases

Living your eyeglasses alone is the first fatal mistake. The portal of time and space opens up when you’re not looking. So leaving your glasses at the desk, by the TV, or by the couch while you get up to a get a snack will be fatal. Never leave them alone. Once you stop using them, place them in your pocket or in a protected eyeglasses pouch attached to your belt. Don’t ever hang out of the collar of your shirt, you’ll be tempted to leave them out somewhere else. Keep them inside a case for extra protection. Somehow a case is more difficult to disappear than the naked eyeglasses.

#3. Safe designated areas, make rules

Never leave them around the house. Many of us leave them in “familiar places” we like. That is OK but they must be safe places, like inside a box or a drawer so it will discourage mischievous leprechauns. Create smart routines as you go about your activities and always do the same thing. For example: always place your glasses in the same exact places at the same time and situations. The more you stray from these routines the bigger the chances of losing them.

#4. Hide them from your friends

When you have a party or people visiting, you should be in red alert mode. This is a clear invitation to leprechauns. This is the number one cause of disappearing cases. Your friends are drinking and distracted and your glasses will go home with them in some cases never to be seen again. So rule # 4 is all about hiding them in the secret safe places when anyone enters your home.

#5. Beat the leprechaun with technology

If all fails, get high tech on the leprechaun’s butt. Get the wireless electronic locator. There are many kinds you can get and some are apps for your phone, but some people loose their phones too so that may not be an option for some. Some of these electronic locators can be purchased below. They might be too big for you to attach to your eyeglasses but you can attach them to your glasses’ case. Good luck with your specks!




 

 

Image credit: Pixabay

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In Category: 4.THINKING, 6.SATIRE

Marcos Taquechel

Marcos is an RN. Thanks for stopping by and reading my posts. I hope you are able to get something useful out of this blog. Take good care of yourself and don't worry about anything until you have something to worry about.

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